Monday, December 10, 2012

How to Be Confident Without Being Arrogant

Unfortunately, many people often perceive a person who is genuinely confident as arrogant or cocky. While the line between arrogance and confidence is a thin one, there are subtle differences. An arrogant person usually makes himself look good by putting others down. A confident person, however, has a strong belief in his own potential as well as the courage to work at achieving what he wants. Changing the way you view yourself and how you present yourself to others can help you tip the balance from arrogant to confident.



Instructions


1- Acknowledge your qualities. Believing in your capabilities and having confidence in your skills is important for your self-esteem and increasing your confidence. There is nothing arrogant in knowing what you are good at, as long as you respect other people for their attributes too.
2- Make eye contact when you are talking to people. Looking at a person when they are talking to you is a sign of being self-assured; looking away or appearing distracted is not just arrogant, it is also rude. Look at the person's entire face when she is talking; this will avoid you giving the impression you are staring.
3- Understand you are not perfect, and it is normal for people to make mistakes. How you handle yourself when you do something wrong is important. Graciously accepting your error and attempting to rectify it is a sign of a confident person. Never admitting your mistakes, or worse, blaming others, is arrogant and a quick way to make yourself unpopular with others.
4- Try to address what triggers you to feel less confident. If you find it difficult being in large groups of people or in a room of strangers, then you need to address this specifically to improve your confidence. You cannot avoid these situations, so you need to work on solving your problem. Practicing positive self-talk is one way to address a confidence crisis.
5- Show your respect for others and do not be afraid to acknowledge other people's confidence. While it is OK to be sure of yourself and your abilities, this should not be at the expense of other people. Arrogant people usually point out the faults of other people to make themselves look good.


Tips & Warnings


Try not to compare yourself to other people. There will always be someone who has something you want or who can do something better than you. It is pointless comparing yourself to these people, especially as you are only concentrating on their good points without considering their bad.
Pretending to be confident is good in situations when you may feel vulnerable or unsure. Avoid over-acting though, as others will view what you think is confidence as arrogance.

How to Cope With an Arrogant Co-Worker

Arrogant coworkers can either bring out the worst in us or push us to gain new levels of skill. Follow these steps to maintain productivity in the company of an arrogant coworker.


Instructions


1- Realize that the offensive coworker is dealing with issues that have nothing to do with you. Depersonalizing the offensive behavior can neutralize your reactions.
2- Become the calming influence that you wish to see in others. Just as negativity poisons a workplace, so positive action creates its own attraction. A compliment goes a long way to diffusing an outburst or overbearing rant.
3- Nip rude and obnoxious behavior in the bud. Calmly state your boundaries to the coworker the first time he or she tries to bend your will or dominate your space.
4- Divert your attention from the arrogant coworker to others in the workplace that could benefit by your coping mechanisms. When the gossip mill stirs, share your own experience and how it works.
5-Learn to exude confidence while developing your coping skills. But beware of the fine line between confidence and arrogance. You do not want to turn into the object of your initial distress.
6- Remind yourself that you are at work to make a living, not to make friends. When all the niceties fail, tell him off. Cross those boundaries, draw a line in the tile and tell off the offending boor in words that leave no room for interpretation that you will not deal with the high horse any longer.

How to Avoid Being Arrogant

Conceit, cockiness, haughtiness, presumption --- call it what you like, arrogance is a highly unpleasant personality trait. The more arrogant a person is, the less likely he is to respect the thoughts and opinions of others. Combined with an elevated opinion for the self, this personality trait will inevitably drive people away and have a negative impact on both your work and your personal life. If you are aware of the problem, taking a few simple corrective measures will improve your interactions with others and keep you from coming off as an arrogant personality.

Instructions


1- Be courteous to others. It is easy to overlook courtesy if you are engrossed with yourself. Thank others, be pleasant when you greet them, offer your seat, be polite. Being courteous will help you avoid coming off as arrogant and self-absorbed.
 2- Offer compliments. Compliment others on their achievements and commend them on work well done. Be sure your complements are meaningful and sincere. Avoid empty, meaningless compliments like "Nice shirt!"
3- Ask questions and allow others to contribute. You may feel that what you have to say is more important, but remember that the thoughts and opinions of others are just as meaningful and important as yours. Accept the contributions of others without automatically shooting them down. Ask meaningful questions and show interest in what others have to say.
4- Admit error. Even the best among us make mistakes sometimes, and admitting to them will help you avoid seeming arrogant. An arrogant streak might make it tempting to deny any wrongdoing or blame mistakes on others, but remember that the ability to admit to your error is a sign of good leadership and confidence.
5- Think of the big picture. When it feels like you're the absolute best, remember that there are many others with skills and abilities that rival yours. No matter what your talents are, you would not be able to survive without the contributions of others, be it family, friends or even complete strangers. Remember that no one is perfect and that you have shortcomings as well.

How do I Handle a Guy Who Is Arrogant?

It is said that the best way to handle an arrogant person is to understand why he or she is arrogant. Arrogant individuals seem to believe they are always right about everything and are better than most ordinary individuals. Arrogance is like a shield to cover an individual's insecurities because he is afraid of rejection and criticism. But, it is not hard to hit an arrogant guy's weak spot.


Instructions


1- Treat him as if he is not the center of the world. Let him know that he is just like everyone else by not giving him as much attention that he is use to. You do not have to ignore him but just let him know that he can not get all of the attention he wants. Do not give him attention. If his arrogance is ignored, he will forget about being superior while dealing with you.
2- Prove the arrogant guy wrong about him being better at everything than others. Show him that you can do things of importance to him. This is his weak spot, but eventually, he will become impressed by you.
 3- Show confidence in yourself and be sure not to become arrogant, like him. By then, he will give you attention and no longer show an arrogant attitude toward you.


Tips & Warnings


If the guy chooses to still act arrogant towards you, just do not show him any attention.
Keep your confidence and do not show him any attention if he has an arrogant moment.

How to Cope With an Arrogant Boss

Arrogance is defined as conceit, self-loving and egotistic. In general, arrogance is self-confidence on drugs. Many employers do not know the distinction between supervising and controlling. Arrogant bosses never gain employees' respect. Arrogant bosses are viewed as dictators, insensitive, rulers and tyrants. Working with this type of boss can have negative effects on the quantity and quality of work generated by employees.



Instructions


1- Understand that an arrogant boss will not be a team player. Therefore, suspicion of everything and everyone will consume the arrogant boss' work day.
2- Be prepared for constant changes in office rules. Arrogant bosses do not play by the company rules. The most minuscule problem will be blown into something colossal. Always meet deadlines. Be professional and punctual.
3- Look for another job or transfer. Be sure to ask for references from a trustworthy source. Be careful. An arrogant boss will view a job search as a betrayal.
4- Play to win. Learn the likes and dislikes of the boss. Become knowledgeable. Take classes if necessary to become an invaluable asset to the department.
5- Elude confrontation. Avoid doing things that will cause negative reactions. Always keep detail written notes of negative situations.
6- Contact the human resources department. It has trained personnel to deal and advise on employment issues.

Tips & Warnings


Working in an unhealthy and stressful environment will cause mental and physical disorders.

How to Deal With Arrogant and Disrespectful People

Although no one enjoys dealing with them, everyone comes in contact with arrogant and disrespectful people from time to time. If you're not careful, encounters with these people can leave you upset and feeling stressed. It's important to remember that although rude people think very highly of themselves, most other people do not view them in the same way. There's a very good chance that this rude person has offended many other people, and it's not just you that has dealt with her disrespect and arrogance.


Instructions

1- Ignore the person to the best of your ability when he is being rude and disrespectful. If you try to talk to him when you are upset, you will likely make the situation worse.
2- Decide what type of relationship you would like to have with him. For example, if he's a co-worker, you probably want to be able to tolerate him in the office. When interacting with him, make a peaceful working relationship your goal. You might want to avoid any conversation with him that doesn't involve work, at least at first.
3- Stay calm when talking to the person. An arrogant person enjoys upsetting you to the point where you say things that you don't mean or start to behave in a disrespectful manner that mimics her own behavior.
4- Discuss the behaviors exhibited by him that upset you, instead of simply telling him that you find him to be a disrespectful and arrogant person. He will likely be more willing to listen to your problems with some of his specific behaviors, than thinking you have an issue with him as a person.
5- Be true to yourself and your beliefs and don't back down when the arrogant person tries to intimidate you. Even if she is very domineering, don't let her persuade you to do something that makes you uncomfortable.

How to Tell Someone They're Arrogant

Arrogant people in life remind you daily of how wonderful they are at everything, but eventually the "I'm-so-awesome" parade gets a little grating and it's time to bring them down to earth. Telling somebody they're arrogant is all about tact, timing and having the guts to stand your ground.


Instructions


1- Pick your battles. Why is it so important to tell this person that they are arrogant? What do you hope to accomplish? Most people don't enjoy hearing negative criticisms, especially when they are true.
2- Keep your cool. It's the best way to say something unpleasant, especially to the over-confident. It's much harder to argue with level-headed reason, though they will surely try.
3- Tell them like it is, but add some sugar. The arrogant are usually the most insecure people out there, which is why they put up such a big front. Say something like, "You're really confident and gutsy, which is something that I love about you. But I think you might be overdoing it. You're coming off as really arrogant, and it bugs me."
4- Move on. Leave before the storm hits, or simply change the subject and try to move on to more pleasant topics. Be sure to throw in a compliment or two to stroke the wounded ego of your arrogant friend/loved one.
5- Keep it light. Humor might be a good way to smooth over the situation and keep them in check in the future. "Uh-oh, your big old head seems to be floating away," and other such comments might help them to keep things in perspective, and might help you to coexist with them.

How to Cope With Arrogant People

In a perfect world, everyone would treat each other with respect and no one would be condescending. At some time or another, it is likely that you will encounter an arrogant person and have to deal with the situation. Whether it's in the office or in the neighborhood, there are techniques you can use to keep your cool.


Instructions


1- Maintain your dignity. If you lose your cool, you will likely regret it later. Even if the arrogant person does not appreciate your efforts to be civil, others will notice and respect you for your integrity.
2- Cope by letting condescending comments roll off. An arrogant person's goal is to demean you and lower your self-esteem. While you can't control him, you can control the way you allow his comments to make you feel. When he tries to make you feel small, remember that he lacks the ability to act like a human being. Pity him for his weakness.
3- Stand up if an arrogant person is addressing you and look her directly in the eye. Put yourself on the same physical level as she is and don't back down. Smile but meet her gaze directly.
4- Listen patiently while he rants without interrupting. Silently congratulate yourself on not acting in such a childish manner. Realize that people who act arrogant are self-conscious on some level and need to use their bully pulpit to pick on others.
5- Challenge a condescending attitude with a comment that sheds light on bad behavior. In a calm voice, ask, "Why would you say such hurtful things to me?" It is likely he will respond with a reason that justifies his arrogance, such as claiming you deserve it but your question will make him uncomfortable and may thwart future attacks.
6- Remove yourself from the situation if the arrogant person won't stop or if the verbal attack escalates. Some insecure bullies, when they find out their victim isn't going to roll over, exert more pressure and become meaner. If this happens, politely excuse yourself and walk away.
7- Find another job or quit associating with a person who is consistently arrogant. If the person is your spouse, consider counseling to try to moderate his childish behavior.

Tips & Warnings


Realize that your worth as a person is not dependent upon the cruel words of an arrogant human being. Use the techniques to help you cope but don't let arrogance get you down.

The Difference Between Confident & Arrogant

When making the comparison between a person being arrogant or confident, we must look at the fundamental differences and similarities between the two. A key to remember is that while all arrogant people are confident, all confident people are not arrogant.


Confident
Confidence is shown when a person is self-assured, and has no uncertainty about his abilities. The actions of a confident individual are often seen as bold and sometimes daring. Confidence in its regular context is not seen as a negative characteristic; it is favored amongst most because it shows self-reliance.

Arrogant
While arrogant people are confident, they are viewed as excessively so. In fact, one meaning for the word "arrogant" is "overconfident." According to Merriam-Webster, arrogance is the display of an offensive attitude of superiority. Arrogance is not seen as a positive attribute, and is frowned upon by most, unlike confidence.

Examples
An example where the specific dynamics of the arrogant and confident characteristics are seen is in athletic teams. When there is a player that is talented, yet feels he is above the rest of the team and treats his teammates as inferior, that player is seen as displaying arrogant behavior. On the other hand, a confident player will behave like fearless team leader, yet treat the rest of the teams as equals.

Effects
The effects of arrogant behavior are usually quite negative. People who are arrogant tend to offend those they encounter, thus making their overbearing personalities difficult for some to tolerate. Adversely, confident individuals are often admired for their bold and assertive personalities.

How to Know if you are Arrogant

People who are arrogant usually believe they are better than others. You can take it as a sign of insecurity. They speak out of turn, their problems are worse than yours. They have a need for attention. They need to brag; to show off. You can be arrogant and not even realize it or know it. It can put people off. Arrogant people are usually doing a lot of talking and not a lot of doing. Here are a few tips on how recognize the signs of someone who is arrogant. Even if it is you.


Instructions

1- Do you interrupt others when they are speaking? Most people who display arrogance monopolize conversations because they just aren't interested in what others have to say. They need to speak to hear themselves because what they need to say is a lot more significant and important than what you need to say.
2- Do you show off business cards and brag about how much you spend on shoes or a dress or shirt or suit? Do you pull out your wallet and handle your money and count it in front of people so others can see?
3- When others are speaking, do you wait until they are finished or do you interrupt them and begin talking as if they did not exist?
4- Do you constantly talk about your problems? Arrogant people always have some urgency that needs immediate assistance. They speak for the sense of sensationalism and are always playing the victim.
5- Do you always compare every situation with something you experienced? Does every circumstance someone went through have to be measured to what you have been through? This is the old "my fish is bigger than your fish" conundrum, and it's tired and it's pathetic. People like this need attention and need to have a spotlight on them while they take the floor -- and most people around them notice.
6- Arrogant people will often put others down, judging and criticizing them. They may joke about them make fun of them, and bash them gratuitously.


Tips & Warnings

Remember: you can be confident without being arrogant.
Arrogance is a sign of insecurity.
If you think you may display some or all of these traits, you may want to reassess how you treat people. Try to see yourself as others see you -- it may be an eye-opening experience.

How to Be Less Arrogant

Most people in society view arrogance as a character flaw. Arrogant people are usually too engrossed in themselves to realize that they are perceived that way. Unfortunately if he doesn't change, he will miss out on the social scene as people will start to avoid him. As a result, he may be unhappy and probably not even know the reason why. Here are some ways to become less arrogant.

Instructions

1- Smile. A genuine smile portrays you as a person who is friendly and approachable. It is not that hard to do, and there is nothing to lose. Practice in front of a mirror if you don't know how.
2- Show kindness and treat others with respect. Learn to love others instead of yourself only. Look for the good in others instead of their faults.
3- Listen more and talk less. Avoid talking about yourself and taking up the whole conversation. Listen intently while others are speaking and show genuine interest.
4- Put yourself in the other person's shoes and think how you would like to be treated. Remember the golden rule "Do unto others as you would have others do unto you." Learn to tolerate others' weaknesses and be patient.
5- Read lots of books. You will soon realize that you do not know as much as you think you do.
6- Expand your circle of friends. You will learn that there are many smart people out in the world. It will humble you.
7- Count your blessings and be grateful. When you have gratitude, you are more likely to be humble.
8- Watch your tone and delivery when speaking. Make sure it doesn't come across as you are better than others. Think before you speak.
9- Reach out to those that are different from you. You may just find that you can learn a thing or two about yourself through the friendship.
10- Give service. Help someone who is in need. The more you serve others, the more humility you will gain. Make something beautiful and give it away to brighten someone's day.